Make A Plan

If your child breaks an arm or runs a high fever, you know to stay calm and where to seek help because you’ve mentally prepared yourself. Reacting to child sexual abuse is the same. Your reactions have a powerful influence on vulnerable children.

The child shuts down.
The child changes his story in the face of your anger and disbelief, when, in fact, abuse may actually be occurring.
The child changes his account around your questions so future tellings appear to be “coached.” This can be very harmful if the case goes to court.
The child feels even more guilty.

Believe the child and make sure he knows it.
Don’t ask questions. Although you have the best intentions, questioning your child about the abuse can (and usually does) lead to more problems. For example, parents sometimes ask, "Why didn't you say something sooner?" From this question, the child hears, "You could have prevented this from happening. But since you didn't tell us, it's your fault." It's not your intention, but that's the way young minds work. It is critical that you allow your child to tell you what he/she wants to tell you and when he/she wants to tell you. If you question your child, he/she will likely be resistant and will probably tell you less in the long-term.
Don't ask questions. (It's worth mentioning twice) Asking too many questions may interfere with criminal investigations. Seemingly harmless questions can actually be inappropriate and leading... TRUST US!--Leave the questioning up to the professionals who are trained in forensic interviewing techniques.
Assure the child that it’s your job to protect him and that you’ll do everything you can for him.
Report or take action in all cases of suspected abuse, both inside and outside the immediate family. The safety of a child is far more important than any emotional conflict you may have to face.
Don’t panic. Sexually abused children who receive psychological help can and do heal.